I Saw God in a Hospital Room

When Ian and I first married, we lived in an old, run-down house on the outskirts of our small town. Even though the house wasn’t much to look at, we made it our home and were very happy there. Hurricane Allen, however, threatened to destroy our peaceful existence as it began its frightening descent on the Gulf of Mexico, so Ian bought some plywood and boarded up the windows to keep us safe. If anything, the boards made the place look better!

Thankfully, the hurricane didn’t do much damage, but unfortunately, the windows stayed boarded up for a long time. Ian thought it was funny and since we didn’t have much money, he liked the fact that it helped our utility bill! The boarded-up windows became a joke, and my jolly husband threatened to leave them up until Christmas so he could decorate them. I finally prevailed, and he removed the boards.

I spent Saturday in the hospital room of Ian’s 88-year-old mother who fell and broke her pelvis last week. His mother is practically blind and the drugs are having a detrimental effect, confusing her abilities to understand where she is and what is going on and also changing her overall personality and perspective. Plus she’s in pain. And my husband is in pain, too, as he watches her. And I’m in pain, as well, as I watch him watch her.

The hurricane that began its frightening descent last week on our family threatens to wreck havoc on the life of my mother-in-law and also on the lives of all who love her, and boarding up the window of her hospital room won’t protect anyone from the damage. And once more, it’s close to Christmas.

The last thing I wanted to do this past weekend was watch my husband hurt. I can board up the windows of my soul faster than a hammer can drive a nail in a board. I can shut down my emotions quite quickly because I’d rather shut them down than hurt. Sometimes when I don’t cry, I’m in more pain than when I do.

But as I watched my husband watch his mom, God tore off another board on the window of my heart and showed me – in that hospital room where I didn’t want to be -- a picture of his love. As I watched my sweet husband watch his beloved mother, I saw his heart ache with more than his own sadness and pain; instead, I saw a heart that desperately desired to help her, to make her situation better, and to take away her pain. I saw a man’s love not focused on his own heartache, but completely focused on how he could help the one he loved. In that hospital room, I saw the way God looks at us.

Nana’s hospital room has a window, but what I saw was inside that room, not outside. I saw God’s love in that hospital room. And I love my husband now even more, which I didn’t think was possible.  And even though Nana can’t see outside her hospital window nor can she see with a clear perspective, others are watching out for her. She may be blind, but her son isn’t. Nor is God.

We can board up our windows at different times – not just during hurricanes or hospitals. We board them for protection, we board them because we’re afraid, we board them because we don’t know what danger is out there. During Hurricane Allen, we boarded our windows because it was necessary; but when it became quite clear that it was time to take them down, we didn’t remove the boards for a long time.

As I look out my back window this morning, I see the beginning of a brand new day, a day where God’s window of opportunity is open for us to see him watching us wherever we are. A day where boards might not keep out all the heartache that life can bring. But a day where God’s love is still there.  In hurricanes or in hospital rooms.   

An Alternative To Duct Tape

If you don’t like the way your foot tastes, here are a few powerful scriptures to pray. I’m carrying them around today.

Anyone else need them?

“May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer” (Psalms 19:14).

“Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing” (Proverbs 12:18).

“My son, if your heart is wise, then my heart will be glad; my inmost being will rejoice when your lips speak what is right” (Proverbs 23:15-16).

“A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver” (Proverbs 25:11).

“The tongue has the power of life and death” (Proverbs 18:21a).

“Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life” (Philippians 2:14-16a).

“Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone” (Colossians 4:6).

AND THANKFULLY, DAVID’S PRAYER…

“Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place. Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow…Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me” (Psalm 51:6-7, 10).

Celebrating the Marriage of Sara Marek and Robert Kramer

God is love.

And because he loves us so much we, too, are to love each other --

Not just in words, but in truth and in action.

And to remember that there is no fear in God’s love, for perfect love casts out fear.

Love from God is patient and kind and sincere; it trusts and hopes and perseveres.

His love comforts and protects; it encourages and up lifts.

And His love never fails.

Follow God’s way of love:

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer;

Be devoted to each other and honor one another regardless of where

You find yourselves.

And above all, love each other

as God loves.

(Readings from Selected Verses in the New Testament)

Filthy Floors

She wore a dusk mask on her face and held a leaf blower in her hand, which she was employing – quite ingeniously – to clean the filthy floors of the building. The halls were massive and dirty and filled with trash. Cleaning them was a long, thankless, never-ending job. Her idea was efficient and creative and…..and a disaster!

What seemed like a good idea, in reality, produced a more massive mess than the one she was trying to clean. Yes, the dirt was off the floor, but it was now on the lockers, the desks, the tables, and the people, who were sneezing and coughing and choking. Eyes were watering and after school tutorials were disrupted. Finally, one brave soul kindly suggested that using the leaf blower, instead of the push broom, might not be the best way to clean up the mess.

Even though the efficiency and creativity of her idea were laudable, her solution to the problem made those around her miserable. Teachers couldn’t tutor, students couldn’t concentrate, and no one could breathe. The noise of allergic reactions rivaled the noise from the leaf blower.  She needed to stop, and she did. At once. Bless her heart. And then she once more began to sweep, a harder and more tedious process but one that eliminated the filth without hurting other people.  

I haven’t made use of a leaf blower to get rid of the dirt in my life, but I’ve definitely tried to take short cuts. I’ve also tried pretending there wasn’t any dirt. There have been times when I’ve looked at mistakes I’ve made, the debris I’ve left behind, the things that needed cleaning up, and the people I’ve hurt in the process, and I’ve wished there was an easier way to deal with it all. But the reality is until I follow the wise example of the cleaning lady and immediately stop when I realize what I’m doing is wrong , I’m just making a bigger mess than before. Until I stop trying to circumvent the problem, it won’t go away. Until I stop doing it my way and start doing it God’s way again, the dirt doesn’t disappear. And when I stop immediately, that happens even faster. And fewer people are hurt.  

When my sweet husband wakes up, he’s going to read this and say I’m preaching again! My response will be that I’m talking to myself. I’ve had a messy week!

"If we confess our sins,

he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins,

and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness"

(1 John 1:9 KJV).

A Lovely Lady

She loved crunching ice, and I remember visiting her home and being delighted with the frozen red kool-aid she kept in the ice cube trays; but regardless of the cold treats that came out of her freezer, she was the warmest lady I knew. And now, as she lies quite ill in a hospital room, she still warms up the place around her -- even though she’s completely unaware. And that was always one of the most beautiful things about her:  she was a lovely lady who was unaware of the effect she had on the lives of people who were fortunate to know her. People like me.

I have known Joanne Murphey my entire life. A family friend, she attended the same Baptist Church I went to during my youth, and her family lived on Concordia Drive like we did. Her three kids were our friends, too, and her husband was a godly man who took care of my mom, sister, and me when our dad died just as he did for his own family. I remember looking out the window and seeing Mr. Murphey and his son, Mike, mowing our yard just like Daddy would have done. The Murphey family was our family. They still are.

Later when I was a student at Texas A&M, I’d go to Bellville to visit and my car would automatically gravitate toward their home. Their home felt like a home was supposed to feel -- a warm, welcoming place where people loved each other, loved the Lord, and loved those who came to visit. Again, people like me.

Joanne had red hair and lived in an orange-colored brick house and kept red kool-aid ice cube treats. And even though I’ve forgotten many other details about her, I’ll always remember how she made me feel:  welcomed and loved.  And I’m only one of many.

The last time I saw her was at the wedding reception of her beautiful granddaughter Morgan. A glowing, proud grandmother, she was surrounded by family and friends, watching the dance and complimenting me on my dress – which was typical – focusing on me, not on her. And when I walked away from her, I remember feeling beautiful and loved and grateful for having her in my life.  

Right now I’m praying for her and for her very special family as she remains hospitalized in Dallas. I’m praying for her, but I’m not worried about her for she always knew the most important thing in life was knowing Jesus Christ. That’s her greatest legacy. That’s where her love came from in the first place. From her heart, God’s home. A warm, loving home she shared with people like me.  

*Note: I just received word that our very dear Mrs. Joanne Murphey was welcomed into her heavenly home this morning. I'm sure she's once more surrounded by a circle of friends and family, who are excitedly welcoming her into the most loving home any of us will ever know. But she's really going to be missed, and my prayers are now for her sweet family.