CHAPTER ONE: STUCK IN SOME STINKY SITUATIONS

From my book Like a Sweet Fragrance

Our house stunk. It stunk worse than dirty diapers, mildewed towels, rotting bananas, or even an untrained puppy. It wasn’t the deadly smell of a skunk, but it was definitely the smell of something dead, and even though we searched in every cabinet, rummaged through every drawer, and looked under every bed in the house, we were not able to find the source of the stink. Home sweet home didn’t smell so sweet.

Several days went by and contrary to what my husband thought would happen, the house continued to smell. In fact, it reeked so bad I didn’t dare breathe through my nose, only through my mouth. I’d smelled a lot of dead mice by that time - we even had one so big that it carried off the trap we set - but nothing smelled like this. And even though I was pregnant at the time, I was nauseous from the stench, not my pregnancy.

We couldn’t escape the smell. Not only was it unpleasant for us, but it was also embarrassing. Any time friends walked in the house, they were assaulted by the offensive odor. It was nasty, nasty, and nasty, and my disposition was leaning that way, too.

Like any good wife, I told my husband that if he didn’t find what was causing the smell, I was going home to my mama, and I reminded him that she wouldn’t like it one bit that he wasn’t taking care of me!

He’d leave for work in the morning, and our two-year-old son and I were stuck in the stink all day long. And I knew that when I went to the grocery store, to our son’s pre-school class, or to Bible study, I smelled too. We all did. It wasn’t a particularly pleasant time in our lives.

Finally, my husband crawled underneath our trailer house and yanked out the pink insulation and anything else that was loose until he finally encountered the culprit – a rather large, robust white possum with jaw-like teeth and sharp-pointed claws had somehow crawled into a plastic bag and suffocated. And it was quite disgusting. And because I prefer to forget that vivid repulsive image, I will do you a favor and spare you the details. But glory to God, the smell is gone, right?

Unfortunately, it wasn’t that simple. As pregnant women do, I spent many nights going back and forth to the bathroom. Several days after my husband, Ian, had disposed of the possum, I woke up in the middle of the night and discovered he was not in bed. As I waddled down the hall to the bathroom, I glanced in the living room and saw him sitting on the floor in front of the couch. Just looking at it. I can’t remember exactly what he said he was doing, but he looked quite guilty as he jumped up and encouraged me to go back to sleep. Which I did. But then the next night, there he was again. Squatting in front of the couch. Only this time he had a broomstick in his hand.

Ignoring him for the moment, I walked into the bathroom and while I was sitting there, this white, furry, rat-like creature scurried out from behind the toilet and crawled over my bare feet before it raced out of the room, almost causing me to go into premature labor and definitely instigating some psycho-like screeching. I remember the screaming. I don’t remember stopping. I want to scream just remembering how I felt – or rather how it felt!

My husband had tried to keep a secret. He knew I wasn’t the only one pregnant. He knew the possum had given birth before she died for he had seen baby possums in our trailer; and because he believed he could catch them before I found out, he chose the strategy of what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her. Unfortunately for him, he was caught; fortunately for him, I didn’t go into labor.

What I know now that I didn’t know then was that possums can give birth to as many as 13 babies. I’m glad the Internet wasn’t available back then for that information certainly would have made the situation worse. To this day I don’t know how many he caught that night, and I don’t want to know. They were gone. That was what mattered.

Later, I found out that possums usually stay in one place as long as food and water are easily available and that it’s not unusual for them to group together under houses as they like ready-made homes. I try hard not to think about how long our mama possum had lived happily under our trailer, and I refuse to think about possums actually breeding under our home!

Shortly after the traumatic possum invasion, the district attorney called, warning us that a prisoner receiving medical attention had escaped from the hospital and his MO was to hide under trailer houses. We moved out of our trailer shortly after that!

Now in heaven, life’s going to be perfect; but in the meantime, here we are, and sometimes we seem to be stuck in some unpleasant and stinky situations.

Maybe that’s where you are right now. You may not be stuck with baby possums running around your house, but you’re stuck in a different smelly situation, and stinky is plain stinky regardless of what is causing the stench.

Maybe you’ve prayed and prayed, asking God to change your situation, yet here you sit. And you’re wondering why in the world God would leave you in the situation you find yourself. Countless helpful and inspirational Christian books line the shelves of bookstores with plenty of valuable information on how we should step out of the boat, and step out we should. As a dear priest I know says, “God doesn’t drive parked cars.”

But what about the times when we step out of the boat only to find jagged rocks and deep drop-offs and stinging jellyfish? What about the murky water and the dangerous riptides? What about the snakes? What about the times when we feel like God has left us treading water without a paddle and rowed on downstream, leaving us behind?

What about the times when we can’t pay our bills or our boss has it in for us or our spouse can’t stand us or our children run away? What about those times?

Maybe you’re in a relationship that is going sour and is steadily falling apart by the hour. Maybe your job is a nightmare with problems that are escalating at a terrifying level. Maybe the person you loved the most has rejected you and you see no hope of gaining back his or her love.

Maybe you’re living with regrets you can’t seem to shake regardless of how many times you confess them. Or you’ve completely surrendered your life to God for ministry, but it doesn’t seem like He checked His email that day. Or you’re living with doubts over decisions you have made even though those decisions were what you thought God wanted you to do. What about those times? What then?

Like many of us, I’ve been in some unpleasant places and I’m not talking about our stinky possum trailer! I’m talking about those difficult and sometimes desperate times when God seems to have left us alone. Times when we know He is there, but we just can’t figure out where there is. For it sure doesn’t feel like He’s anywhere around here!

One of those times, in particular, was extremely painful; yet it was a time when I was walking very closely with God. I was immersed in Bible study, deeply desiring to live my life the way I should, seeking to know Him more and more. And then? Where’d He go? I felt more like I was stuck in a mess than alive in His midst.

And I certainly didn’t like the mess nor did I understand why God would leave me in it. I mean, really, what exactly was the problem? I was doing what I thought He wanted me to do.

I remember waiting and waiting and waiting some more. Waiting for Him to take me out of the situation, waiting for Him to fix the situation, waiting for Him to change the situation. Just waiting for Him to do something. But certainly not to leave me in it! And I remember thinking, “Look, Lord. I’m growing older by the moment. Nothing’s happening here. If you want me to do this, you’d better hurry!”

It’s like the sign at the gas station that says “Free gas tomorrow,” so you go back the next day and guess what? The sign says, “Free gas tomorrow.” And you keep going back, yet no free gas. I mean, where’s the free gas? I’m doing what the sign says!

During that particular time, however, I learned that God really is with us in the midst of our waiting, regardless of how stinky our situation might seem. Before I always knew it was true because I believed what the Bible said; but now I know it’s true because of that particular experience with God.

And I also learned that when we find ourselves in stinky situations, we’ve got to dive in the Scriptures and stay there. And stay there some more. And then stay there even longer. He’ll speak to us through his Word, he’ll comfort us in his Word, and he’ll confront us with it as well.

He’ll also share stories with us, stories of people in the Old and the New Testament books of the Bible who would have known exactly what we’re going through. Stories of women who have made mistakes and men who have suffered regardless of how much they loved God and wanted to do what was right. Stories of women and men whose lives reach out to us with their experiences with God and how He walked with them and loved them and guided them through the best of times and the worst of times. Men and women whose lives began once upon a time but where was their happily ever after?

And he’ll show us these stories aren’t just about history; instead, they’re about the present. They’re about what matters to God. They’re about Jesus and our relationship with him. And they’re about the unique, heavenly fragrance we leave behind wherever we go.

In 2 Corinthians 2:14, The Apostle Paul writes, “But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of him.” Or as The Good News version reads, “God uses us to make the knowledge about Christ spread everywhere like a sweet fragrance.”

Pondering that remarkable verse, we’ll see it has a powerful three-fold message.

First, as followers of Christ, we are led by God, who is most assuredly in charge.

Second, as followers of Christ, we are part of Christ’s parade, and it is most definitely a victory parade.

And third, as followers of Christ, we spread the knowledge about Christ everywhere, everywhere, everywhere - even in stinky situations. Especially in stinky situations for stinky situations definitely need a fragrant aroma.

If that is the case, and the Word of God says it is, then the question is this: If we’ve prayed and prayed and prayed some more and we still find ourselves in a difficult situation, could it be that God desires the fragrance of Christ in that place? And that He has chosen us to spread the precious aroma of His dearly beloved Son to the place where we are? To the people where we are? And that God will bless us in that place as well as others who smell the fragrance of Christ in us?

Could it be that just as the men and women in the Bible have a story to share with others, we do too? A story without pretense? A story with scars? A story with all the hurts and pains and suffering of life? Yet also a story that brings hope to those who have lost it and comfort to those who are suffering and understanding to those who feel confused. A compassionate story. A story that says, “I get what you’re going through.”

A story that says I understand what it’s like to have gone from being overwhelmed with the wonder of God to wondering where He is. I understand what it’s like to think I don’t matter because if I did, why is this still happening to me? I understand what it’s like to have prayed year after year, yet my situation still hasn’t changed. Forget spreading a fragrance of Christ, I’m trying to survive!

God knows our stories. He knows exactly where we are even if we’re in the midst of a seemingly hopeless situation. And whether it’s a situation beyond our control or one of our own making, he hasn’t forgotten us. Our lives are important to him and our lives are important to others, too. Just like the men and women in the Bible, we matter, and the Word of God repeatedly reassures us that life can be richer and fuller and more fragrant simply because of the time we spend in His presence. And as we do, the fragrance of Christ that we leave behind will make an unforgettable impact everywhere we go.